11/08/2026
Watching cancer drain the life out of someone you love is a kind of pain I would never wish on anyone. It’s not just the illness that scares you it’s everything that comes with it. It’s the fear of waking up one day and finding them weaker than they were yesterday. It’s the fear behind every phone call, every hospital visit, every test result.The hardest part is the helplessness you would give anything to take their pain, their fear, their exhaustion, and carry it yourself, but you can’t. You can only sit beside them, hold their hand, make dua, and pretend you’re stronger than you actually feel. Cancer doesn’t only make you fear losing someone; it makes you grieve pieces of them while they’re still right there in front of you.
وقت ازالہ نہ کر سکے گا جن کا
لوگ ایسے بھی کھوئے ہیں ہم نے۔
I still remember when I found out Dado had cancer. I was only around 15 and didn’t fully understand what was happening, but I understood enough to be terrified. I remember crying myself to sleep, thinking about losing her. Since then, cancer has been one of my biggest fears. I think when someone hears that they have cancer, the fear itself can make it feel like half of their hope for life disappears. Suddenly, you start thinking about how much time you have left, what the future will look like, and whether you’ll get to experience all the ordinary moments you once took for granted.
I hope when my time comes, I leave this world in Ramadan just like you did, Dado, and become a woman who does purdah like you, with the same grace and simplicity. 🤍 And Dada Abu, I hope I grow up to have a personality like yours, the kind of person people trusted and came to for mashwara. And Chachu Samad, I hope I become as kind, gentle, and polite as you.
I just hope I carry a little bit of all of you in me, because honestly, becoming even a little like you guys would mean everything to me. 🤍
