ZIZAN EXCEL MEDIA

02/04/2021

😬Nagging Wife.
A man and his nagging wife were on holiday in Jerusalem, when the
wife suddenly died. The funeral company told the man that it would cost $45,000 to ship her home or $500 to bury her in Jerusalem. The husband said, “Ship her home.” Shocked, the undertaker asked, “But sir, why don’t you bury her in the Holy Land and save the money?” To which the husband replied, “A long time ago, a man was buried here and 3 days later, he rose from the dead….I can't take THAT RISK!

05/11/2020

PS 3 for sale...

02/11/2020

Welcome to November the only month that begins with NO: It means No weapon, No shame, No recession, NO debt, NO sickness, NO demotion, NO bad news, NO sudden death,
NO accident, NO wahala of any kind, NO regret, NO Loss, NO pain, NO shaking, NO weeping, No sorrow, No disappointment, No failure and No Calamity, as you proceeds this month it shall be victory galore in the name of God Almighty. Amen. It's a month to tell the devil, NO WAY!!!!!!
Stay safe and Stay bless. 🙏🙏🙏💙

30/10/2020

https://chat.whatsapp.com/HhwCApX8wVfEsbp5PuUi6f

WhatsApp Group Invite

25/05/2020

04/05/2020

~BE AN ELEPHANT~
An elephant and a dog became pregnant at the same time. Three months down the line the dog gave birth to six puppies
Six months later the dog was pregnant again, and nine months on, it gave birth to another dozen puppies. The pattern continued
On the eighteenth month the dog approached the elephant questioning, "Are you sure that you are pregnant? We became pregnant on the same date, I have given birth three times to a dozen puppies and they are now grown to become big dogs, yet you are still pregnant.
Whats going on?" The elephant replied, "There is something I want you to understand. What I am carrying is not a puppy but an elephant. I only give birth to one in two years. When my baby hits the ground, the earth feels it.
When my baby crosses the road, human beings stop and watch in admiration, what I carry draws attention. So what I'm carrying is mighty and great." Don't lose faith when you see others receive answers to their prayers Affirmations.
Don't be envious of others. If you haven't received your own blessings, don't despair. What you carry is being processed, prepared and packaged for a greater impact. Say to yourself "My time is coming, and when it hits the surface of the earth, people shall yield in admiration.
Good day and Keep staying safe

04/05/2020

~BE AN ELEPHANT~
An elephant and a dog became pregnant at the same time. Three months down the line the dog gave birth to six puppies
Six months later the dog was pregnant again, and nine months on, it gave birth to another dozen puppies. The pattern continued
On the eighteenth month the dog approached the elephant questioning, "Are you sure that you are pregnant? We became pregnant on the same date, I have given birth three times to a dozen puppies and they are now grown to become big dogs, yet you are still pregnant.
Whats going on?" The elephant replied, "There is something I want you to understand. What I am carrying is not a puppy but an elephant. I only give birth to one in two years. When my baby hits the ground, the earth feels it.
When my baby crosses the road, human beings stop and watch in admiration, what I carry draws attention. So what I'm carrying is mighty and great." Don't lose faith when you see others receive answers to their prayers Affirmations.
Don't be envious of others. If you haven't received your own blessings, don't despair. What you carry is being processed, prepared and packaged for a greater impact. Say to yourself "My time is coming, and when it hits the surface of the earth, people shall yield in admiration.
Good day, and Keep staying safe

23/12/2019

I attended
A Wedding ceremony
With a gathering of
About 30 people.

I sat in the front seat.

A Lady started distributing food.

She started from
The back and unfortunately,
It didn't get to us who were sitting at the front.

Another Lady started
Sharing the Drinks,
She started from
The front.
But unfortunately
I had
Already moved
To sit At The Back.

Again
The drink
Didn't get to me.

I was
So furious that
I stood up
To take my leave.

But then
I saw
Three ladies
Each with A Big Bowl.

This time,
I tried to Be Smart.
I Sat Right
At the Middle.

One of the Ladies
Started the sharing
From the Front,
The Second Lady
Started
Distributing from
The back.

The Two Ladies were
Sharing Roasted Chicken.

When
They got
To the middle,
Where I was seated,
It got finished again!

Feeling So frustrated,
I Bent My Head,
Putting My Face
In My Hands...

But Then
The Third Lady
Tapped me
And
Stretched Her Bowl
For Me To Pick.

Joyfully I Stretched
And
Put My Hands
Inside The Bowl...

Guess
What was
In the Bowl ?

TOOTHPICKS !!!!

Moral:

DO NOT TRY
To Position
Yourself in Life,

Allow GOD
To Put You
In The Right Place

Otherwise
You will
Wrongfully position
Yourself
For
Toothpicks Only !!

😆 😆 😃 😃

17/12/2019

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. experience is the best teacher, when you make mistakes you learn.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
Good Morning .

14/11/2019

This is not a joke!
What are the characteristics of a mad person? Is it not dirty, rough and torn clothes?
So when someone wears torn clothes is he or she not mad? Probably showing little Madness. Is madness not in stages? When a man or a woman can't feel he or she is wearing torn clothes, what is that? It's a question o.