09/13/2024
I’ve heard reports of a recent uptick in hate speech in New Hampshire and our region. Often, we overhear such exchanges, and generally will avoid confrontation with someone we do not know. There’s often a shrug of the shoulders with a “I’m not like that”, or “I hope I set a better example.”
Engaging with strangers regarding overheard hate speech is admittedly difficult. There are nice, non-confrontational ways to do so, which often are beyond my abilities, but I try when I can. Perhaps a simple “that wasn’t very nice, was it?” can suffice.
What everyone can do is when the speech is not overheard but it comes in our own circle of friends, neighbors, relatives. It may be as simple as a tasteless joke or as bad as a slur. When that happens, we should politely object to the comment, saying it is not helpful, it makes you feel uncomfortable, and it is unfair to use. I find the most common situations are where someone tells a joke (usually within an aura of confidentiality) as they think I am of like mind to find it funny. I try not to miss the opportunity to say it’s a sad attempt at humor, I find it discomforting, or some other firm but gentle phrase.
We can’t control other people’s behavior. We can control our reaction to hateful speech, and it is a weapon that is always at hand. Opportunities to do good can be rare; I hope you will speak up when you have one!